I love you, I love you.
That is all that has ever mattered.
Live your full life and I will always be with you.
--- Cell phone call, September 11, 2001
Let's all pretend that I haven't ignored this blog for the past month, and we're all up to speed on what's going on in my life, ok? Because telling you exactly what has been going on, did go on, is currently going on is a epistle I don't have the time or energy to write, nor you to read. Trust me. It's been crazy. Is crazy. And I'm not sure I even believe all of it—yet.
But please know I'm safe, happy, loved and still looking at the Tetons through my windows (and will be for awhile).
This year has been one of the most transformative of my life. It's also been the hardest, saddest, best, happiest and every other emotion you get to experience when you pack up everything you own and move across the country to completely change your life.
I've had moments of sobbing on the studio floor. Moments of spreading my arms to the sky and screaming I love my life. And regular everyday nothing special moments too.
But through all those moments—those hot mess moments, those jump up and down moments—the one thing I've consistently had is you. That's right—you. Whether I know you or not. Whether we speak, or smile, or laugh, or cry, or just exist here together on this planet. I've had you.
You, who comes here and reads my words. Who may scoff, or laugh, or roll your eyes. Who may send me love notes, or what heck are you thinking notes, or hold my hair, or dance with me. Or never even talk to me at all.
You've been there.
And knowing that has been what's pulled me through this year. Has helped me pick myself up off the floor, smile a little brighter, try a little harder. And for that I'll always be grateful.
You are beautiful and amazing and so precocious to me. I can't tell you enough—show you enough how much I appreciate you. How much of a difference you've made.
And I know I often suck at telling you. Can drop off the face of the earth for weeks on end. Can get so wrapped up in my daily drama that I temporarily forget you. I'm sorry for that.
But please know I love you. I love all of you. Even if we drive each other crazy sometimes, or don't understand each other, or don't talk for weeks (or at all).
I love you and I'm so grateful for you. I couldn't have done any of this without you.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
You are so important and matter so much and I wish I could hug each of you.
More stories are forthcoming (scout's honor), but I have a lot of people that I can and need to hug, and kiss, and tell I love. And so do you. So scoot.
The world is too beautiful & life's too short for you to be sitting around reading my blog.
I love you dearly and miss you terribly.
Why saying I love you is so important.